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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Sigh.........

When I was a little girl, I loved Barbie. I had every Barbie you could of. My favorite was Day and Night Barbie. I had the office play set as well and I would pretend Barbie was a lawyers secretary. I loved her pretty business skirt suit. When I grew up, I wanted to be that lawyers secretary, wearing the pretty business suit and working in a big fancy office building. I wanted to make lots of money and look it too....

27 years later, not exactly as I had dreamed. Not at all in fact. I never became that beautiful successful women. In fact, the closest I ever came to an office was behind a lobby desk in a hotel, making $12 an hour at most. (I did own a pretty dress suit though, my Grandmother bought it for me one Christmas many years ago.) 

After I graduated high school, I got a job working at Robinsons May in the Petite department at our local mall. It was a part time job, just something for me to do to make a little cash. At that point, I had no desire to return to school. That was one of my biggest mistakes. Instead, I met a scum bag guy that brainwashed me into thinking he hung the moon. I was pregnant by 19. I went through hell, living with his family. When my child was 2 months old, I moved back in with my parents and tried to make something of myself. I went to the local community college and registered for school. I made it through one semester and realized I couldn't hold a full time job, raise my child and study too, so I dropped out. I worked full time at a Marriott Hotel, and for the three years I worked there, I loved it. Life was simple then. Sure I couldn't drive, but I had friends and family I would hang out with. I had a LIFE!

10 years later, I have 8 children. A loving husband that works his butt off to support us. Two dogs with fleas and 3 cats with fleas. I still don't know how to drive and I haven't left the house since I gave birth to my 8th child. The only communication I have with the outside world is my next door neighbor Mel. Now that school has started, my days consist of homeschooling until 3pm, laundry, cleaning and making dinner.

My husband Sean, on the other hand, has a great 9-6 job. Wears nice dress clothes, has a laptop, a smart phone, makes great money and works in a big fancy office building once a week. He travels all over the southern part of our state on a daily basis and meets lots of interesting, professional people. Today, he got to spend the day at a beautiful beach, playing football and having a barbecue with his co-workers. He even got paid to do it. He has the career and social life I wanted.....and I got the barefoot and pregnant housewife job. 

I feel so useless and unimportant. I feel like everything I do is for nothing. Like I'm just here filling space so someone else can live my dream. I'm not saying being a stay at home mom isn't important too, because I know it is. I just feel trapped because I have a paralyzing fear I can't overcome. My life wouldn't be so bad if I could learn to drive. I know a lot of stay at home moms who have it all, because they can cart themselves and their children around. They have hobbies to keep them sane. They have a social life and family to support them. (Sean and I only see my Mother once or twice per year.) We don't have any of that. Sean doesn't like to socialize outside of work. I guess he finds small talk annoying, which is ironic since he gets paid to do just that all day, everyday. He won't let me hire a babysitter because he doesn't trust anyone except my mother with our children. So, here I am, having a pity party blog post for myself. I know, I'm pathetic and need to get a life.......sigh........but thanks for listening anyway!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Funniest Sign Ever!

When I was a little girl, my Grandparents had this sign hanging in there kitchen, to the right of the doorway leading into the dining room. It was a wooden sign, which looked to be from the late 50's or early 60's. I loved the sign because it was so funny. The front of it had three stick figure firemen holding a fire hose. Above them read "In Case of Fire, Raise This Flap....." When you raised the wooden flap, the inside read "Not Now STUPID, In CASE of FIRE!" I use to laugh my butt off at that sign, reading it over and over again. Well, almost 11 years ago my Grandmother passed away and then my Grandfather did as well a year or so later. All the possessions in the house were either taken by the siblings or given to Goodwill. That sign was taken by my Aunt Doreen. I haven't seen it since. I tried to find another one online, but all I could find was this picture of the sign....



If anyone knows where I can find this sign, please let me know. Its a memory from my childhood that means a lot to me.


Monday, September 12, 2011

Fall Decor-Framed Pumpkin

I've been looking for new creative ways to decorate the house this fall. I wanted something easy and inexpensive to make. I found this really cute idea from Someday Crafts.


It's really simple to make and all you need are:
1. Styrofoam pumpkin (from a craft store)
2. picture frame with glass (make sure its big enough for your pumpkin.)
3. Scrapbook paper
4. glue gun and crafting glue (for the scrapbook paper)
5. ribbon (optional)

Just glue a strip of crafting paper to the glass. Cut your styrofoam pumpkin by 1/3, so you have a flat back to work with. Use the glue gun to glue the back of your pumpkin to the scrapbook paper. Let it dry for an hour or so and then tie a strip of ribbon to the stem (if you wish). That's it, you can hang it on a wall or set it on a table. Too cute and so easy and cheap to make!!! I've actually seen it used with other fruit like pears, apples and lemons. All great for a country kitchen theme.




Sunday, September 11, 2011

How I remember 9-11

I know most people would soon forget that horrible attack on our country 10 years ago, but I can't help but remember. I remember it well because I had just flown home from visiting Sean in Boston the evening of the 10th of Sept, 2001. I remember laying over in Newark and looking out the window at the two towers. I was talking to Sean on the phone and asked him what they were. (Yes, I was one of the few who had never seen them in person, had no clue what they were.) That was the first and last time I had ever seen them.

The next morning, around 5am Pacific time, I got a call from Sean saying his sister had been hit by some ditsy girl while on her way to work. Sean was headed to the hospital to pick her up. Since my body was still on EST, I stayed up and turned on the TV. I was laying in bed watching the second plane fly into the second tower. At first I thought it was a movie, but soon realized it was real. I freaked out, tried calling Sean again, but he had already left his house. I ran into my parents bedroom and woke them up, turning on the TV. I remember the fear I felt. Watching people panicking, firefighters running to help, and the noise. Its etched in my sole forever. I personally didn't know anyone (that I know of) but I do know people who lost their loved ones. I can't help but tear up at remembering all I saw on the news for weeks. Our country has never been the same since. My children will never know what the world was like before that awful day. It really is sad.

So, to end this on a more positive note, today we will be spending the day celebrating life with our children. We are having Liams 6th birthday party. There will be no sadness for them, they are too young to understand and we want them to remember the 10th anniversary as a happy day, not a sad one.

God Bless all who lost their lives....

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Critter Love

SHere are a few pictures of the kittens. They are now a week and a half old and so cute. I was finally able to get some decent pictures of them. The black and white one will be going to the lady next door and the black one is mine! His name is Shadow.




Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Saying Good-bye and Pinterest

Sean had his last day as an RSM with his company on Saturday. The "team" bought him an ice cream cake and this cute little card. They all signed it and had nothing but nice things to say about working with him for the past 2 years. They were all pretty sad to see him go. (All except one girl, who was a total b**** to him the entire day.) He felt bad because he thought he should have felt some sort of emotion. He had grown close with two or three of the team members and spent most of his life in that store for the past two years. He just couldn't understand why he felt NOTHING about leaving. I'm not sure why he's so worried about it. In the end it's just a job. They wouldn't think twice about him leaving the company, so why should he. He moved on to bigger and better things. He should be happy about that. I don't know, I have never really had a "real job" so I guess I just don't understand. Anyhow, his former boss wanted him to come to one last meeting this morning and have cake and say good-bye to the other RSMs' in the district. Sean didn't really like any of them, and I'm sure the feeling was mutual. Still, his boss asked him 3 or 4 times to come in, and Sean really liked the guy, so he agreed. Besides, he wanted to show them all up in one last team game....lol. Leave it to Sean to piss everyone off one last time. (He ALWAYS has to win). So, he left for his meeting at 8:15am. He was scheduled to start his new position at 11am. He will be working Tues-Sat, 9-5. Tuesdays are office days, meetings and paperwork. He has a little cubical, an issued notebook and Blackberry to work with as well. Oh, and did I mention they pay for his car too? Since the majority of the job will be driving, they pay 55 cents per mile. On average he will be driving 75-100 miles per day, 4 days per week. Doing the math, that's somewhere between $700-$800 per month, which more than pays for his car and gas! He has been assigned to about 40 stores. Walmart and Costco are his clients. (They gave him two of the companies biggest accounts!!) Since he had been wearing a uniform for the past 3 years, he had to go out and buy an entire wardrobe. He had to do it this past weekend, because they wanted him to start TODAY. We weren't expecting to have to drop $400 on clothes, so it has made us a little tight on money this month. He did get a big raise, so we should be fine in two weeks! All worth it if he enjoys the new job!

Thanks to my fabulous friend Michelle, I have found my newest hobby! It's called Pinterest and its totally addictive. The best way to describe it...it's kinda like a virtual bulletin board with all the things you like, in one place. There are thousands of people on the site (Kinda like a mature Facebook) collecting photos of things they love, ideas for their home, office, schools, cars, recipes, you name it. Anytime you're on a website and see something you like, you can just pin it to a board and share it with others. It directs you straight to the site it was pinned from, so others can see how it was made or shown. It's so much fun and I've gotten so many great ideas for baking, decorating and photography. You have to be invited to join the site, but its easy to do and only takes about a day to receive your membership. Here are a few things I really like...

Hanging flowers in a jar, from Country Style Magazine in AU. 

Yarn and Balloon hanging ornaments. Great for birthday parties, Christmas ornaments and so much more. Really simple to make.


Missing sock collection, a cute idea for storing all those annoying missing socks.

Lastly, here's a few pictures. Have a great day!

Dee-duh and her kittens, one week old!

Tinker-Mary!

Sam-10 weeks old

Minnie Sean!!! Horrifying isn't it...lol.




Saturday, September 3, 2011

Mary's 3rd Birthday Party

Even though Mary's actual birthday was on August 31st, we celebrated it yesterday because Sean had to work on her birthday. So, we had a fun day hanging out, watching movies and munching on In & Out burgers and fries! She didn't get a nap, so by time we started opening presents, she wasn't as peppie. Getting her to smile was next to impossible...lol. Here are the best pictures I could get.

Declan waiting for cake.

Cake time!

Mary feeding her new baby.

Fionn waiting for cake.

Liam ready for cake.

Lizzie ready for cake.

Mary and her new baby.

Mary and Minnie Mouse.

Mary ready for cake.

Opening presents.
Present time!!!



Tinkerbell slippers!

Blowing out the candles.

Mary and her new Tinkerbell dress and baby.

Marys 3rd Birthday Cake.

Congratulations Gillian & Brayton!

My long time girlfriend from my Marriott days Gillian, and her husband Brayton just had their first child via c-section yesterday at 11:07am. She weighed 9lbs 20 3/4 inches. Her name is Kaitlyn Marie. Congratulations to you both, she is beautiful!!!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

The Lost Photo

When Sam was born, we had pictures taken of him and Sean (since it was Father's Day). A week later, it disappeared. I searched the house top to bottom trying to find it. After losing a kitten in my closet today, I had to take EVERYTHING out to find him....and guess what I found pushed in the back of the closet. I WONDER WHO HID IT THERE??? So, here it is...Oh, and I did find the kitten with a little help from her Mama!