Friday, January 13, 2012

Just a little venting, don't mind me....

I was reading my blog list and came across a womens blog who was bashing stay-at-home moms. She made a top 10 list of what we do all day long. It made me laugh because so many times I have been asked these questions and more. I never thought of it before, but they are rather rude and annoying to be asked. So I decided to answer these questions and add my own. So here are my top ten "NEVER Ask a stay at home Mom" questions.

10 Things You Should NEVER Say to a Stay at Home Mom

1.  It must be so nice to sleep in every morning.
I think this is my favorite.  Because we have 7 children ranging from 9 to 0. Most mornings the 4 oldest boys are up screaming, yelling and slamming doors before the sun is even up. Seans' alarm goes off at 7:30am every morning. Not that we ever actually need it. I must then get the laundry started, dishes put away and counters/tables sanitized before I even begin to make breakfast. (We have two annoying cats)  I have to fix breakfast, change diapers, pull out something to thaw for dinner and clean up the trail of garbage from the dogs, all by 8:30am. Then its on to feeding the kids, stopping food fights, and generally keeping the peace while my husband does his morning conference call. I also have to feed the baby some time in between. I have to clean the kitchen AGAIN, get the little ones settled in the living room and the older kids started with school. Did I mention I home school? All by the time you leave your house for work.  Sleeping in to me is 6am.  What time do you wake up again?  Oh yeah, did I mention that weekends follow this exact same pattern?

2.  Can you tell me what is happening on my favorite soap?
I have to admit, I have been watching the Young and the Restless since I was in kindergarten. Thanks to modern technology, the DVR is my new best friend. I currently have around two weeks   of episodes waiting for me. Not that I ever have time to sit and watch them. If you want to know what is going on in Sid the Science Kid or Thomas, I'm your girl.  If you want to know anything about the adult world, you're asking the wrong person.  Since I can't drive, I never leave the house. On the off chance that I do get to watch TV during the day, it is while multitasking - you know, folding clothes or vacuuming floors.  So I probably don't know if Luke and Laura are still together.  But I'll be sure to ask my mommy friends for you.

3.  Don't you get bored just sitting home all day?
Sitting?  What's that?  The closest my butt gets to sitting is while feeding Sammy, but I'm usually standing while doing so because I am teaching a class in the process.  I don't get lunch, so no sitting there.  I usually eat my dinner while serving the family theirs, again that's standing.  I am constantly running around between teaching and household chores.  I do get to sit down, but its usually only to pee.  I long for boredom.  I long for one day of having an hour uninterrupted to sit down.  So, no, rest easy - you don't have to worry about me getting bored!

4.  It must be nice to have nap time every day.
Babies nap.  Mamas do not.  In the two hours of nap time (if I'm lucky) I teach, fold clothes, pick up toys (that will need to be picked up at least 10 more times before the day is over), vacuum floors and dust furniture.  If I'm feeling really lucky, I may try to squeeze in a three minute shower.  So don't worry that I'm dreaming away while your working - the only dreaming this mama gets to do during "work hours" is daydreaming about a break!

5.  Don't you just love never having to get dressed up for work?
I always want to answer this one with "Why yes, because I prefer spit up covered PJ's to pant suits any day of the week!"  Once upon a time, I got to wear a nicely pressed skirt suit with pantie hose and heels. Those days are long gone. Do you know how frustrating it is to never have time to get dressed?  Or do your hair and make-up?  Or perhaps actually leave the house? PJ's and boxers are my uniform of necessity.  I can't crawl on the floor in a skirt.  I can't clean bathrooms in heels.  And I miss being dressed up and not having to worry that my clothes are going to end up with formula, jelly or some other sticky pre-eaten food.  

6.  What do you do with yourself all day?
Well, let me tell you what I don't do.  I don't get to close my office door for five minutes alone. I don't get an hour lunch break where I can just get away.  Actually, I don't even get to go to the restroom alone.  So what do I do?  I teach, cook, clean, referee, pick up toys, bath babies, fix bottles, clean litter boxes, pick up chewed up toys, kiss boo-boos and pretty much anything else that needs to be done during the day.  And tomorrow I'll do it all over again.

7.  It must be so nice to not have a boss!
I do have a boss - 8 actually!  Their names are Sean, Declan, Cian, Liam, Fionn, Mary, Lizzie and Sam.  And it's quite humbling when you are directed around by a 9, 7, 6, 4, 3, 2 and 7 month old.  If I was my own boss I would schedule a lunch hour alone and make nap time 4 hours a day.  But my bosses don't agree with this.  Some days they don't want to nap.  Some days they don't want to give me time to eat. Some days they don't give me time to breathe.  My bosses are some of the most demanding out there because reasoning doesn't work with them.  Pleading doesn't work with them either. If the house is a rec by time Sean gets home, I have him to answer too as well. And taking a sick day - that definitely doesn't work with them!

8.  What's the last good book you read?
Do you mean an adult book?  As in not "Super Fudge" or "This is Our Home"? If I am still awake by 9pm, I may read a few pages on my tablet.  I did just finish reading "The Help", but it took me almost two months to do so. Most nights I crash when my head hits the pillow. I'm lucky to get 6 hours of sleep with Sean tossing and turning all night. So you enjoy that new novel that you're reading on your lunch breaks.  By the time I get to read it, you'll have read at least a dozen more.

9.  What are you going to do on your holiday?
I'm so glad that your work closes for certain days each year.  And that you get a paid day off to do nothing.  The kids don't have an off button.  And unfortunately I don't get federal holidays or two weeks of paid leave a year.  So on scheduled days off for the rest of the world, I'm jealously looking on while doing the exact same thing I do the other 364 days of the year.  

10.  Why don't you just put the kids in public school?
Again, this is a favorite. Have you actually taken a stroll through your local public school lately? How many kids are in your childes homeroom class? How many visits to the principles office have you made because your child has come home with a black eye or a split open lip? These are all questions I don't have to face because I refuse to put my children in that situation. With the federal budget the way it is, most schools have cut out after school sports, field trips, art, music and my favorite, school lunches. Now what does that leave for your children to do in their spare time...The classes are far too crowded for one teacher, leaving slower children to fall behind. I have two that need extra help. And lets talk about the students. Have you seen or heard the language that spews out the mouths of 8 and 9 year old these days? Or the talk of sex in elementary schools? My girlfriends 14 year old daughter, who is in 8th grade, was caught in the shower with a boy while ditching school. She spends more time texting her boyfriend than doing homework. What's worse, she can't even speak proper English. What the heck does "Slow much" mean? So the next time you ask me why I refuse to put my children in public school, why not ask yourself who your child is hanging out with or why Sarah is failing English.....

Now, don't get me wrong.  I am sure there will need to be a follow up to this entitled 10 things you should never ask your working friends.  But in all seriousness, please respect that I work hard at my job.  No, it may not be traditional.  Yes, it may be a little less structured then your corporate position.  But do trust me when I say there are days I would switch with you in a second! But in the end, I bet I'm a lot happier with what I do then you are....


  1. I'm glad you're blogging again! Even if it is to vent ;) I've been thinking about you recently and hoping that you all were doing okay. *HUGS* from the Travis Family!

  2. Arley,
    Thank you for this I agree with them all. My boys are in public school, but all the teachers, pricipal,AP, and office staff know me. I give my boys extra homework and make sure they are treating others with respect and being treated with respect. Luckily I haven't had any problems yet, but they are only in 3rd, kinder, and pre-k. M boys will also not have a phone until they are at least in high school and working.


I am always happy to read comments. Please keep them tasteful as I will not allow insults to myself or others! God Bless!